Every time my mother comes home, the first words out of her mouth is never a greeting. The first words are generally, “are you going to….” If you have to ask, my answer to her is always no. why? it’s become reflex by now. Saying yes doesn’t bring me less grief, so I’d rather do something I want to do. By saying no helps me achieve being able to do what I want.

I am a grown adult. I could simply just drop out of school which she enrolled me into and find a job and just stick with it regardless of how crappy it is. But I like the program I’m currently in. Would rather be an actual full time student than a “part-time” student taking 4 courses though. My parents don’t understand that my course load IS a full course load. If I were actually doing it part time, I’d only take 1 or 2 courses max. sigh.

The truth is, I have very little motivation. The little motivation I do have is generally zapped right out of me by the time my mother tries to talk to me. Try is the operative word. In my family, communication is lacking in every direction. Wait, I guess that’s being unfair to my relationship with my sister. Hmmm, I will say that communication between the parental unit is lacking in every direction. How is it that I can remain calm to a stranger that annoys me, but I cannot remain calm to my parents?

I have first world problems. hahahaha